March 02, 2015

the princess and the pee...pee...and the quitter

today's post brought to you by...a quitter.

i'm the quitter.

my turtle is two years and four months old and still isn't potty trained. and guess what...i don't see it happening any time soon.

my farmer was at a bachelor party this past weekend and i thought it the perfect opportunity to test the waters...get a feel for kaye's readiness.

it all started on friday. i drove to the store for supplies and gathered the necessities from around the house:

O N E - a giant bag of m+m's
T W O - some delicious naked blue machine juice. kaye's favorite.
T H R E E - water bottle
F O U R - pink, princess toilet (baby bjorn)
F I V E - ipad
S I X - cued up on the DVR with a movie
i would have thought in all my preparation i would be that mom that successfully potty trained her child in two days. yeah...i've read all about those moms and it makes me want to feed their kid a bunch of gatorade and lock all the bathroom doors.

no no...i'm not that vindictive and i would never set a child up for failure. however...potty training is H A R D and it makes me think bad thoughts. such as...maybe kaye would be comfortable in diapers until she's 13? maybe?

anyway...i had all my supplies ready and this is how it went down.

1 | start the morning with kaye picking out her big girl undies. she proceeded to be in her big girl undies for well over an hour before i thought it was a good time to have her sit on her toilet.

2 | at this point, she had downed over 16 ounces of watered down juice and a full eight ounces of milk. i was convinced a successful sit on the toilet would happen any minute.

3 | 20 minutes passed. nothing. 30, 40, an hour and 15 minutes went by with nothing. i finally texted my sister and said, "it's not happening. i'm quitting. she's not ready." instead i decided to wait it out a few more minutes and then, just like happened.

4 |  kaye looked at me and smiled. i looked at kaye and cried. i literally cried...we had been waiting so long and i was so so proud.

5 | we cleaned everything up, celebrated, jumped up and down, and kaye received her beloved prize. i was going to give her two m+m's for each success...but i was so thrilled, girlfriend got a handful. i couldn't help myself.

6 | another hour passed and i was certain after all the juice and milk she would have to go again. so i asked her, and she sat down on her own. she proceeded to stay there for another hour and a half.

the waiting. it's terrible. but kaye was SUCH a trooper.
after success on day #2. she was SO proud of herself. and obviously if she's sitting on a princess toilet she has to be dressed as such.
7 | finally, she had her second success on the princess toilet and received another handful of m+m's. that's when it all went downhill.

8 | 15 minutes later was accident #1 and not 10 minutes after that was accident #2. huh? yeah...i was so confused and frustrated. it was after that we called it a day. she was almost due for nap time anyway.

the next morning we started the process over. kaye sat on the toilet, again, for over an hour and finally went. it was most definitely at that point i decided this was not the way to spend our time. kaye had spent the last two mornings sitting, watching movies and drinking juice. #overit.

my new strategy will be as follows - i'm going to consistently ask her every day throughout the day if she needs to use the toilet, or more specifically, "kaye, do you need to go pee-pee in your princess toilet?"

i know, one day soon, she'll answer yes and that will be the perfect time to take potty training to the next level with bigger prizes and larger celebrations. i'll probably buy her a car.


  1. Potty training is the worst! I'm working on Boy #4 and he is almost three and shows little interest. It's going to be a loooonnnnngggg spring!

  2. A car?! I could use one of those, I just went on the potty! :D

    Good luck to you & Kaye, I hope that she gets a lot more M&M's.

    Mandie ~

  3. I feel your pain. I attempted to potty train my son when he was under two...yeah, that lasted for five minutes. I decided to wait until right before he turned three. It was hard hearing all the other moms talking about how their little ones had been potty trained since they were 18 months, but I knew, I just KNEW that he wasn't ready. Then, when the time came, I did what you did...I bought the "supplies." I also bought cheap little toys and wrapped them...M&Ms, too! He did great and I'm happy I waited, but it wasn't easy. I cried like you did. I also but my entire life on hold. No joke. Everything stopped and all my attention was on him and that toilet. It was exhausting. Now my little girl, who just turned 22 months, WANTS to sit on the potty and I'm reluctant to do so... Isn't that weird? Anyhoo, I agree about the car! I told my husband that I felt like potty training was as difficult as getting up hour after hour and night after night with a newborn. It really is tough. All this to say, YOU GO MAMA! Take your time and hang in there. They'll stop pooping their pants...eventually... ;) ;) -Marie :)

  4. potty training is definitely a game of patience- i personally wouldn't try for the two day whatever, the game takes time. we started by having 10-15 min potty breaks every hour or when at home and letting the kids look at a book/ipad during the time or read to them if possible vs. just sitting there for an hour . also go ahead and keep the normal drinking/eating schedule, if you know she is going to poop around a certain time then sit her on the potty. but at the end of the day it will click, just keep introducing it to her and stay positive, and when it happens you can jump for joy!!

  5. You did better than I! I have no desire to potty train my daughter who is the same age as Kaye :) I'm confident that she will let me know when she's ready and it'll be an easy transition that doesn't require plopping her on a potty for an hour sipping juice and watching movies ;) I hope Kaye is the sMe!!

  6. Potty training is no joke. I hated it. Potty training about broke me. LOL. Seriously, one of the first things I said to Jim after we found out another baby was on the way was "I have to do potty training again?!" Whew. Hats off to ya sister.

  7. Oh my. I got frustrated just reading this. I can't even imagine trying to get a little one to express their need to go potty after they've just spent the last two years going when they felt like it and having it cleaned up. The time will come and it will feel victorious! Then YOU can get the new car :)

  8. It is so frustrating but it will happen! I know for us, bare bottom was the best way to go. My daughter is 3.5 and still has occasional accidents, hang in there mama!!!

  9. You go girl! I don't even want to think about trying to potty train. I know it's going to be a doozy!

    The Mrs. & Co.

  10. I feel like I've been trying to potty train my now two year old for months! She knows how to go - if I sit her on the potty she goes - she just won't tell me. And I'm too lazy, if I say do you have to go potty and she says no I say ok...

  11. Well done for trying momma, you are both doing so well. There are obviously so many different tried and tested "methods" to try, and I know how frustrating it is getting so much advice from different people... But we tried a more relaxed approach - we let SK tell us when she was ready rather than the other way around - and we offered a trip to the toilet every hour, and within days - she got the hang of it. We found that unless we asked, she wouldn't ask us to go and if we forced her to sit when she wasn't ready, she refused to go too. Hope it gets easier x

  12. We've been dropping the potty hints for about a year and my son has never seemed interested enough to stop pooping in his diaper. Don't get me wrong, he's done about 80% of #2s on the potty in the last week, but that's only because I make him sit there 3 times a day -- and we're going to go broke buying all the reward toys. Kaye will get it when she's ready and it won't take her an hour to go pee every morning. Hang in there, mama!

  13. Ugh- it's the worst! Just give it time- I'm with you, I thinking asking a lot is probably a better use of your time. I'm just impressed that your sweet girl would sit there for so long!

  14. Potty training is not easy! I have no idea how those moms do it in a weekend! Xavier wanted to do things on his own schedule --- nothing new there! As soon as we stopped pressuring or insisting he needed to be potty trained, he just started doing it. We still have an occassional accident, and where pull ups to bed just in case...but otherwise he is doing really well. Like, we can actually drive 1 1/2 hours to my parents house and he stays dry the whole time! Fingers crossed he does this well during the summer when we go on vacation :)
    Good luck! I am sure Kaye will catch on when she thinks she is ready :)

  15. This is a timely post because I was just asking my mother for advice on potty training (obvi not trying anything any time soon with a nine month old, just mentally preparing myself, ya know?!) She said the best thing to do is to wait until the child brings it up and wants to do it. She claims she waited for me to tell her I was ready, and just like that, I was potty trained - no accidents, not even at night. Which is kinda what others have said too. So I guess the waiting game begins... And Lordy, boys take forever to want to be potty trained (or so I hear)!

  16. Potty training is worse than having a newborn! We did the 3-day method but after day 3 there wasn't an 'ahhha, she's potty trained' moment it was more like WTF, another accident? But we just stayed consistent (with the help of our babysitters) and over about two weeks she really got it. Forcing it does not help. While she's been using the potty for about 2 months now, we have another hurdle...public toilets!! Which makes going anywhere interesting. We always have to keep her potty in the trunk, no joke! Also, do yourself a favor and get a kid toilet insert that sits on the regular toilet. SO much better when she starts going regularly and for #2, far less cleanup! Sorry, TMI, but really, lol! She likes using the toilet insert much better than the small potty. Good luck girl, her time will come!

  17. We did the 3 day method when my daughter was 22 months and I swear by it. Just know there will be MANY accidents the first day or two but it will eventually click. We didn't make her stay on the potty. Just took her every 10 min, made her try, and then off the toilet she went. Good luck, it will happen!

  18. Oh girl I don't envy you at all! Potty training was HARD! And I think it's just so different for every kid. I do give you props for being so patient though...well shit actually kaye was the patient one...sitting on the chair for an hour and a half. Damn! Don't get really will just happen. Cruz finally managed two months before his 3rd birthday and I didn't think it would EVER happen.


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