November 21, 2011

would you wear this?

yo. so...i am definitely fashion challenged. the max. i fear department stores because they are just so darn big. i start to sweat. i get dizzy. i feel sick to my stomach. these are all very legit symptoms and i am definitely allergic. but don't think this means for one second that i don't do my fair share of retail therapy. here is what happens:

1. drive one hour to the big city
2.park at eddie bauer entrance.
3. bee-line it to banana republic without making eye contact with anyone.
4. hot lap around the BR.
5. another hot lap.
6. purchase.
7. leave mall as quickly as possible.

let's keep in mind i drove just over an hour to get to the mall in the big city.
well, the mall is really effing with me these days. j.crew decided to make an appearance. seriously j.crew? apparently they wanted a piece of the fashion-stunted bell pie. so now i do steps 1 - 6, then sprint-walk to j.crew, hot lap, hot lap, purchase AND I'M OUT! run to exit (sweating).

7. leave mall as quickly as possible.
8. come up with legitimate reason to visit starbucks.
9. drown my fears in a delish soy latte.
10. i feel better.

so basically what this means is i have a wardrobe of very similar looking clothes. a lot of solid colors. 45,000 pairs of jeans that look the same. 10,495 v-neck sweaters and stretchy long-sleeved t-shirts. 1-ba-ga-trillion (that's a lot) of camis/tanks. and some scarves. solid colors of course. patterns and any material other than cotton are the devil. devil, i say.

ex. 1 - this was taken in reno (obvs.) this summer. we were there celebrating my friend's 30th. (love you boo!)
solid shorts, solid tank, solid vest-sweater thingy. but whoa baby! i certainly
thought i was jazzing it up with that necklace! gettin' crazy!
ex. 2 - this was taken in park city after an outdoor concert. yep, i wore this to a concert. please note the solid tank, one of my many many solid cardigans and i jazzed this outfit up with white cords. so daring.
ex. 3 - this is an engagement picture. the only thing fantastic about this outfit are my boots. let's give a shout out to cowboy boots! let's give a giant thumbs down to cream cardigans paired with white tank tops and plain scarves. i'm not going to diss my blue jeans tucked into the boots because i'm still into this look and i think it's slightly outside the box.
but then pinterest entered my sheltered farm-life. inspiration. courage. so now in the past few weeks i have branched out ever so slightly. i'm trying to pair my boring wardrobe with items i've bought in the past but never had the courage to wear. but, let's not get crazy...i CERTAINLY haven't worn the outfits in public. i just take a picture of myself in the mirror and then text my sister in denver to see if it works. so now i'm asking you...does this outfit work? when i get some feedback i'll let you all know what farmer had to say.

notes - yes, i am missing a cowboy boot. i was too lazy to put it on. i'm sorry you see a toilet in the background. yes, i live in a single-wide trailer. the pink storage tote you see actually sits on top of a garden tub that i had my husband cover with plywood when i moved in because we had no storage and the 55 sq. ft. garden tub was unnecessary. we both hate baths. we didn't even include one in our master bathroom design. rebels.
i think that about covers it. so let me know what you think. good, bad, ugly? i want to hear it all. my feelers won't be hurt. promise.

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